|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | i'd sleep with simon cowell to go to bootcamp |
| (txtr1) : | hell id sleep with louis walsh | |
|
 |
|
|
| (txtr1) : | I woke up with two girls sleeping in my bed naked and they made me breakfast and had to leave after that, see why i didnt want to settle down with her? |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | what's Bukake? |
| (txtr2) : | Come home NOW! | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | my mum just told me that the bed would be best suited not against the wall, i knew these walls were not sound proof |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye. |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | I just caught my parents doing role play...Im moving out. Can i stay at yours? |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | Have you ever been in class and the teacher walks past you and you can smell his butt? |
| (txtr2) : | This is why I get A's and you get D's | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | She farted proudly the loudest fart and said what "guys like that". She actually did that. |
|
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | Ewww dont you hate it when you pick your dog up and you finger his asshole by accident |
| (txtr2) : | Some things we keep to ourselves Will | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | im frisky... you should come over ;) |
| (txtr2) : | nah, id rather stroke the monkey | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks. |
| (txtr2) : | Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf? | | (txtr1) : | Holy shit r u serious? How? | | (txtr2) : | Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you. | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs. |
| (txtr2) : | Two? | | (txtr1) : | Two. | |
|
|
|
|
| (txtr1) : | Welcome to dumpsville - population YOU!! Next time you come on to one of my friends make sure its the slutty one not the christian one. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
